A squirrel in Torrey Pines:
Found this in my inbox today:
Hi, Jon! I feel very excited when I write this e-mail for contact you, you’re very very smart person!. I’m an universitary student, I have a big problem, I hope that you can help me, please, You’re my only hope . In this semester at my university, I’m very very bad with the academic result, I dissaprove 3 courses, I’m so much to get depressed. Never in my life I dissaprove so much courses, because I’m study so much, but definitely I don’t have lucky, it’s the only reason for this academic disaster. At previous semesters, my marks are good. I don’t know if you can modify this marks at the Intranet of the university and next with much security I help you with something that you ask me, but that it’s at my reach. Please answer me fast, before the 25th of December, because for this dates, the academic results are deliver to my fathers. And if my father see this marks, they’ll kill me with much security, moreover I compromised with a enterprise for work, and this academic results had seen for with bad eyes for the enterprise.